oscar

yesterday finally went for the oscar test. nurse said - don't go toilet first. duh! i just went! so i had to drown myself with water to fill my bladder up for the ultrascan. when it was finally our turn, we had a chance to see our baby again! baby was sitting in an upright position and the womb seems to be upright too. doc says - cannot measure neck this way. baby needs to be lying down. the solution was to drown more water in so that the bladder will hopefully "push" the womb into a vertical position. darn, i was already bursting my bladder then but diligently drank more water and waited. but we were very happy that baby was fine.

surprisingly, baby was very cooperative during the next scan! the doc moved the scanner around my tummy and baby started to do a little dance and wobble and went to lie down so that doc could take the measurements of the fluid behind the neck. every now and then, baby will jiggle and float upwards and the doc will "snap" a zoomed-in picture of its neck. we were absolutely thrilled with the image. doc commented that baby has a sharp nose. yup, it was rather obvious i would say! doc commented that the measurements seems fine but will still need to combine the blood test results.



when we went back in the afternoon for the results, we were a bit nervous but i kinda knew that baby was going to be fine. and true enough, results show that we're at a low risk of Down's syndrome. oh what a relief! those past 2 months of stress and worry has paid off with this visit. of cos not to mention a hole in the pocket for this bloody expensive test!!! it's really our happy day - it's finally the end of the first trimester and everything will go smoothly from now on. =)

went to meet my 2 dodo friends for dinner and when i broke the news to them, besides the gaping mouth, all sub said was - no wonder i thought you looked a bit chubbier. darn, it goes to show how obviously fat i am. paulie is too polite to say that of cos!

well, another announcement to my other dear friends tonight!!!

glow? what glow?

here i am again, grousing grousing grousing. today dates 12 wks 2 days. one more day before my OSCAR test. can't wait to get a negative result so that everything is "official". my spare tyre seems to have a life of it's own, i have zits on my face, my hair looks like bird's nest, i just look fat and sallow... where's the glow?? i thought most pregnant women glow during their pregnancy? i guess i'm one of the minority. i only look decent after piling on war paint but it still doesn't conceal my chubby face.

just yesterday night, i was telling hubby that if doctor permits me to do re-bonding, i might just cut my hair short. to that he sniggered and was about to say something and he held back. in my heart i knew what he wanted to say and bugged him to say what's on his mind. to which he burst out laughing and said that i'll look even fatter with my hair short. i had to laugh too cos i know that it's true. i'll look like a big head. twit!

nausea's still here, though some moments it's ok. it gets bad in the evenings and i feel like i'm salivating non-stop. it's a real yucky taste. oh please take away my nausea and let me GLOW!!!!

i feel really bad lying to all my friends and it's kinda "lonely" not being able to share my woes and complaints to anyone... maybe that's why i've been so grouchy. i seek refuge in forums and of cos tormenting my hubby. i feel bad making him feel helpless. he just wants to know that baby's safe.

one more day before i can see our baby again!!! =)

and time goes slowly by

it's still only... what? 11wks old?? man... this is really really a long wait. one more week to go before our OSCAR test (which costs a bloody $300!) and the final week of the first trimester. it means that once the test clears, i can "officially" announce to my friends. i feel really bad lying about my pregnancy when they ask "so how? you trying to have a baby?" and i go like "ya, trying, trying. slowly lah" my dear hubby has told me a zillion times to not spill the beans and knowing what i kpo i am, it's really agonising....

the past few weeks have been rather terrible. i mean, on one hand i'm elated about my baby, on the other, i'm plagued by permanent food problems. i'm a pig. i love my selective food. BUT since my pregnancy, my baby has taken over my whole taste system and turned it upside down. i no longer crave my or jian, carrot cake, curry, laksa, maggi mee etc... instead, i find myself eating soupy stuff. in fact, i can't decide what to eat everyday cos i don't feel like eating anything. nothing seems appetising. but i'm bloody hungry most times. and i get ragey when i don't get my food in time. and i have this permanent foul taste in my mouth whole day long. plus headaches. they call this nausea. and i had the cheek to say i wished i had nausea so that i know that i'm still pregnant. damn. my nausea has turned me into a monster. i'm grouchy all the time, i snap at my mum, i am lethargic when i'm with my friends... oh what fun it is to have whole day sickness!

oh, did i mention fluids yet?? i'm thirsty all the time but yet water puts me off. so does coke. or any of my old favourite drinks for that matter. i mean, i can still drink all those but they leave an awful taste after which i absolutely dislike. so there you have it - a dehydrated woman who doesn't like to drink anything.

so i guess it's not all sugar and spice with my pregnancy. one can't have your cake and eat it too huh? my buddy seems to be having a good time though. her tummy's showing slightly and she looks and feels good. she has no morning sickness and a hearty appetite!!! i want that to happen to me!! oh, plus she's having a boy. so she's gonna be one of those who will glow throughout her pregnancy... oh how great that'll be! i bet i'm gonna be those who waddle like a penguin and look like a puffed up ball. imagine me walking beside her. darn.

but but but... i still love my baby ya? i don't regret anything. i just wish the nausea will go away. peace... =)

jiggy shake

we thought we'll see a much bigger baby this time and we were not disappointed indeed. our little baby has grown! we can see its little arm and legs and its head was turned slightly to face our camera. just when we were still staring intently at it, baby decided to go a jiggy shake for us!!! we saw it bounce up in the waterbag before settling down again... we were so thrilled and couldn't stop giggling. it even waved at us (probably just moving the arms but give us the benefit of doubt ya?). we wished we could keep peeping into the little life inside me everyday. one of our silly talks involved getting the same machine so that we can look at our baby as and when we liked. oh, we could even allow people to come view their babies at a small cost! ha... we wish!



our baby, all 3.2cm of it and growing.